Monday, January 05, 2009

French-Canadian food: Ass ham

True, living in Quebec can be challenging for non-Francophones in terms of finding jobs and apartments, reading contracts, applying for grants, conducting business, dating, ordering food, and dealing with any public service over the phone, but for the hardy few who manage to overcome those minor inconveniences, there are occasional and wondrous rewards, like poutine.

This weekend, at a Normandin diner somewhere between Quebec City and Montreal, I discovered that the "poulet club sandwich" is an entirely different order than the "poulet sandwich club" and, therefore, my dissatisfaction was entirely the fault of my indisputable ignorance. I cut my losses and choked it down. You just can't argue with the facts.

My friends were smart to have kept it simple, each ordering the "gourmet" hamburger platter – a dish we've learned by rote. Simply scrape the coleslaw from the patty, add some ketchup, and it's nearly like the ones back home. Pay a little extra for cheese curds and gravy on your fries.

While none of us got exactly what we'd wanted, compensation for our troubles came with the bill at the end of the meal. Printed on them was a more accurate description of its quality. A "hamburger platter" to us, is an "assiette hamburger" to those at Normandin, or, in short: Ass ham gourmet.

14 comments:

i am playing outside said...

i couldnt even tell you the number of ass hams ive eaten in my lifetime...

pistols at dawn said...

Wow. I guess if you've got to eat ass ham, might as well be a gourmet version.

wyliekat said...

Well, it's a lot more honest a description of the hamburger than McDonald's has ever offered. But in their case, I'm sure it would have to be a HoofLipAss ham gourmet.

I'm Kate... said...

Sounds like joke among the wait staff.... "I'll take the Ass Ham Gourmet with a side of fries. Hold the pickle."

Kate Savage said...

i am playing - I take it you aren't worried about the ol' adage 'You are what you eat'. :P

i am playing outside said...

HAH!

Kate Savage said...

pistols - Well, if the Quebecois do anything right, it's that.

wyliekat - Yikes. I don't even want to think about how they make their special sauce.

I'm Kate - Whose pickle?

Ace C said...

Lol. Good stuff. If I ever make there I know what not to order now.

surviving myself said...

Mmmm... ass.

I'm Kate... said...

That's the question! :) haa! That's just wrong...

Ms. Florida Transplant said...

Ass-ham. That has a nice ring to it.

My Ex is an ass ham.

Kate Savage said...

Ace C - Well, it has its place. That said, "ass ham" is just not kosher.

surviving myself - Ass. That's quite a revealing inaugural blog comment.

I'm Kate - You said it!

Kate Savage said...

Ms. Florida Transplant - Sounds like your Ex and mine came from the same pig.

ling-ling san said...

There's a place in Japan with ass cheese and ass sausages on the menu. But I've yet to try ass ham. Sounds tasty.