Misunderestimated Supervillains (after last call)
"Is that for measuring my dick?" He aimed a dirty sausage-finger at the measuring tape on my costume. "Yeah, cuz it might not be long enough, harrrrrgh," his wing-man piped in, while the rest of their torso-heavy buddies formed a semi-circle around us and guffawed, as was expected. They kept piping it in, too, spewing as much crap as spittle, potty-mouthing to the max. Such is the norm after last call in the party-heart of the city, when you're a group of women dressed as Supervillains.
We didn't look particularly sexy, hilarity was our goal, but that didn't matter. We have heads and legs, and at 3:30 a.m. on The Main in Montreal, that's all anyone's really looking for in a woman. For this particular group of drunken frat-boys, encountering humans possessing both vaginas and costumes, in addition to heads and legs, was proving to be a little too much to handle. Likewise, encountering slobbery frat-boys shouting about each other's penises was a little too awkwardly homoerotic for me. Keep it in the locker room, I say. Tired, and at the end our night, we were in no mood to facilitate this verbal circle-jerk.
Still wearing our capes, we decided to cut our losses and make a run for it, succeeding in little else than calling more attention to ourselves. The catcalls didn't bother us, except that everyone assumed we were all variations of Wonder Woman, as though we're that uncreative. No, together we were the League of Misunderestimated Supervillains - the female contingent comprised of: The Bad Joker, powered by pun and with the frightening ability to kill any conversation, Feral Cat and her eye-averting sidekick Camel Toe, The Personal-Space Invader (me, equipped with the "invadable" space-measuring tape that caught the frat-boy's attention), and most tasteless of all, The Golden Showerer.
While, as a member of the ridiculous League of Misunderestimated Supervillains, it would have been nice to defeat the frat-boys, we were no match for their vulgar, drunken machismo. Especially not me, The Personal-Space Invader, because when it comes to guys like that, I'd really rather keep my distance.